Afternoons with Mr. Kirkland (2P EnglandxReader)

“Hi Mr. Kirkland!” Artie looked up. A little middle school girl trotted into the bakery. She was an adorable little thing, at the beginning stages towards womanhood. She came in three times a week on her way home. She usually popped in for a treat or if she needed an ear. He loved when she came in. He always recognized her (h/c), (e/c), her little chubby face, and she always wore her (f/c) every Friday. She reminded him of himself at that age. Full of life, big smile on her face, odd and wasn’t trying to be anyone else but herself. Today was Monday so she was wearing her school uniform, a white blouse with (any color you like) skirt. She used to wear a jumper but since she was in the seventh grade, she got to wear the skirt. She was a frequent visitor, so much that in order for her to pay for her little treats; she often swept the shop for him and minded it when he popped into the back for things.

“Hello _______! How was school?”

“Not so good,” she said. He passed her a cupcake and pours her some milk.

“Aww, what’s the matter?”

“Valentine’s Day’s is next week and don’t have a Valentine,”

“Oh sweetheart, you’ll find someone someday,”

“That’s just it…I don’t want a boyfriend yet. I want to give everyone a Valentine like we all did the year before but everyone really teased me last year about it,”

“Oh love, don’t feel bad! My class teased me when I did the same thing! There’s nothing wrong with being nice to everyone,”

“I know! But everyone keeps saying that I act like a little kid. I don’t think so! I mean I think I act grown up!”

“You do but you shouldn’t be too much in a hurry to grow up, dear! Enjoy your youthful innocence now before you have to settle down and be an adult for real,” he smiled at her.

“I know but everyone keeps saying how everyone is going to have a date, but me. Everyone like paired up with someone already. I’m the odd one out, again,”

“How about this, since you’re my best customer, we’ll have a Valentine’s Day tea party, just you and me,”

“Really?”

“Yep! It’ll be just like when I was with my son!”

“Your son liked tea parties?!”

“Adored them!” that was an understatement. It was true that Alfred did participate in tea parties but against his will, mainly because Artie bribed him with vegan treats. Then, when Artie had his awful phase of wanting to dress someone up, he “persuaded” Al to be his dress up doll for a bit. Al wasn’t too pleased until Artie threatened to never make him another non-poisonous, vegan treat again. He tried to get Matthew to do it but Artie changed his mind when two large moose trampled his bakery on two separate occasions. The girl beamed at him!

“Mr. Kirkland you have yourself a deal!”

“Splendid! It’ll be so much fun!”

***
_________ wasn’t normal, not by regular normal standards and this made her a target for the other students and the teacher. She was often tripped, pushed, and teased. She could only be at ease at home but sometimes that was even hard. Her parents barely understood her. She liked talking to Mr. Kirkland; he was the most understanding adult she knew! She couldn’t wait for her tea party. She always wanted to go to a tea party but she knew everyone would call her a baby or a little kid. Despite the bullying, she liked school. Mom often said, high school will be better, it was like a rule, had a crappy elementary and middle school tome, better time at high school and college. She couldn’t wait but she liked how things were now. The only thing she was dreading was becoming a teenager. Teenagers always had a bad rap and she was terrified of being constantly in trouble. On Friday, she was making her Valentine’s Day list. It would be rude to exclude anyone from any V-day plans. However, she was making her list on what cards to bring. She loved when her mom used to buy the character Valentine’s and she would pick and choose but this year it was going to be different. She had a computer (and quite good at making things on it) and she had a Pokemon card studio! Pokemon was still popular! She started making a list during study period. She could give all the girls the cute Pokemon and the boys the manlier looking ones but some girls didn’t like the girly ones and some of the boys liked the cute ones because they were strong. Vulpix was cute and strong so is Raichu and of course the legendary birds! That was when someone rips her list out of her hand. She looked up. The woman had black hair, iron gray eyes, and a face that showed signs of aging but there was so much Pancake makeup that made her look so artificial that she every time she creased her face into any position, her age could be shown. This was her teacher, Miss Flippen. She snatched the piece of paper from ______’s desk and read it over, “Class, show of hands. Who are seventh graders?” the whole class rose their hands, “Very good. Now show of hands, how many of you still like Pokemon?” none of her classmate raised their hands. Miss Miss Flippen smirks, “So if anyone gave you a Pokemon Valentine Day card, you would think they were what?” she pointed to a boy.

“A baby?” she pointed to another student.

“Who gives Valentines anymore?” said another, “So lame,”

“Seriously, that’s for elementary school kids,” Miss Flippen smiled in satisfaction and tossed the paper in the trash can. ________ sighed and went back to her book. Miss Flippen took it upon herself to make _______ as miserable as possible as a way to toughen her up. She allowed the more popular children to pick on her; she didn’t encourage any of her creativity, found ways to humiliate her in front of the class, and tried everything in her power to get her free dress privileges taken away from her on Fridays. Today was their essays on who was the person they admired most whom they knew. _______ worked hard on hers and there was only one person whom she could think of, Mr. Kirkland. Miss Flippen made each student read another student’s essay.

“Miss Flippen!” shouted Mary, the teacher’s pet, “_______ wrote something weird!”

“No surprise there,” she takes the paper and reads it over, “My hero, Mr. Kirkland. Mr. Kirkland owns the best bakery in town. No matter how bad I feel, he’s always there with a cupcake and a smile. He dresses really cool for an adult, always in bright colors. He always have a big smile on his face, even if something is bothering him. I hope I can be a cool adult like Mr. Kirkland!” Miss Flippen laughs cruelly, “What is this?”

“My essay?”

“Sounds to me like your Mr. Kirkland is a pedophile who found himself a gullible victim. Don’t say nothing if he abducts you,”

“Mr. Kirkland would never hurt me! He tells me loads of good cool things!”

“Oh? Like what?”

“Like, always drink my milk everyday so I can have strong bones, always laugh and play because when I get order I won’t be able to, and that I’m not weird, I’m creative!”  

“That’s because milk grows breasts bigger, stupid,” said Miss Flippen laughing, “He must really want you to be his toy,”

“Not a toy! He says I look like a doll!” Miss Flippen smiled darkly.  

“Class, repeat after me. Mr. Kirkland is a pedophile,”

“I’m not saying that,” said Beatrix, a Goth girl, “Especially if it’s not true. He sounds like an upbeat person,”

“Detention. Now class,” half the class recited the terrible phrase over and the other half just sat there with horrified looks. Poor _______’s innocent mind didn’t even know what a pedophile was.

***
Artie looks up as ______ runs into his bakery; at least he thought it was her. She was covered in black berries and other types of goo. Her pretty (f/c) dress was starting to stain.

“My dear what happened?!”

“I was attacked!” she said sobbing, “They’re still chasing me!” Artie said nothing but took her into the back and reached into a trunk and pulls out a dress about her size.

“There’s a bathroom through there, change into that, I’ll take care of everything,” he winked and went away. Like clockwork a few kids came into the bakery. Artie smiled pleasantly at them. There was often a crossroad when it came to middle school, the good ones and the not so good ones.

“Hi Mr. Pedophile!” said Mary smirking at him. Artie smiled pleasantly.

“May I help you, dears?”

“Did _______ come here?”

“I’m sorry but she didn’t. Are you friends of hers?”

“No way,” said another child, “We don’t want to be around a weird pedophile’s love toy,”

“My dears, I have no idea why you’re calling me such an ugly thing,”

“Because you are!” said Mary, “You like little kids!”

“And that’s the only definition you know? That a pedophile liked children?”

“Like to have sex with them, sicko,”

“Please leave,” he said with a big smile on his face, like the Cheshire cat. A few of the students backed off, some tried to push their boundaries. A large bat came down in front of them. Their eyes widened as when they saw that it was filled with nails and covered in something blood-like. The figure holding the bat, next to Mr. Kirkland, was a tall brunette man with murderous red eyes.

“Are you little shits deaf? BEAT IT!” they immediately hightailed it out of there.

“Thank you, Alfie!” said Artie smiling.

“I’m not here for you! Give them up!” Artie sighs and gives him a bag of brownies.

“Can you do me a favor? I have a guest in the back,” Alfred grabbed his bat and headed towards the back, “NO not that type of guest! Just mind the shop while I make sure she’s okay,”

***
_______ sobbed bitterly as she changed out of her ruined clothes. She wished she was normal like other students. It wasn’t like she didn’t try to be normal but it was just too hard. She exited the bathroom. The dress was adorable! It was red with large white hearts around the skirt part. Mr. Kirkland was waiting with milk and (favorite cupcake flavor) for her. She ran and hugged him tightly.

“Shh, it’s okay, my dear,” he wipes her tea with his handkerchief, “Young ladies shouldn’t cry, it’ll make their faces all blotchy and you look a lot better when you smile,” he bops her nose with his finger. She giggled, “There we go. Now what happened?”

“W-Well, Miss Flippen started teasing me in class because I made a Valentine’s Day list. Then she read my essay about you in front of the class,”

“You wrote an essay about me?”

“It was suppose to be a surprise,” she said fiddling with her hands, “It’s about the person I admired most! And since you’re really nice to me, I wrote the essay. Well, they started calling you a pedophile! What is a pedophile?”

“It’s a sick individual who hurts children,”

“That’s not you! If anything you really go out of your way to help kids! Well, after school, Miss Flippen told me to empty the trash behind school. So I did. Mary and those kids were waiting for me. They told me that my dress was ugly and started talking about me, then Mary threw black berries all over it and they all started throwing things at me. I ran back towards school but Miss Flippen was there and she said it was okay and to clean up in the bathroom. I started cleaning up in there and then all the lights shut off. Then everything was a haze. The kids came out from the stalls and the torture resumed. I ran to the door and opened it. Miss Flippen was there and she pushed me back and I managed to slip out and ran as fast I could. Miss Flippen then put a bounty on me, saying that if they damaged my dress, they’ll have free dress for a week! It was terrible!”

“It was! You poor thing! Here, stay here and calm down. You’ll be okay,”

“Damn it! How long to have I have to stay up here!” Al barked from the front. ________ jumped. Al’s eyes fell to the girl. She smiled nervously.

“_______ this is my son, Alfred,”

“Nice to meet you!” she said smiling.

“Likewise,”

***
Mr. Kirkland took _______ home. Her mom was waiting for her and immediately hugged her when she saw her. She told her to clean up.

“Bye Mr. Kirkland! And thank you!” she scampered upstairs. Mom didn’t seem to mind Mr. Kirkland, in fact, she thought it was really nice that he not only helped her daughter but was very gentlemanly towards her. He explained what happened. She wasn’t too happy about the children’s ganging up on her child.

“But that’s not the worst of it Mrs. (last name). Miss Flippen has been mercilessly bullying her as well. I don’t like to use foul language but that’s just burns my cupcakes to have a meanie as a teacher!” Mom used everything in her to not laugh. Now she knew where her daughter got her odd, colorful language.

“I know, Mr. Kirkland,”

“Please, call me Artie!”

“Okay, but we can’t prove anything. No matter how much we complain, this woman seems to twist everything back on ________. I’ve thought about transferring her to another school but she won’t hear of it, mainly because she would miss going to your bakery. The private school world is much different and sadly, she got her tenure and it’s always her word against hers,” Mom sighs and smiles at him, “Thank you for bringing her home for us,”

“No problem! I’m planning a tea party for her on Valentine’s Day; I’ll be thrilled if you came too!”

“I would love to but her father and I have plans but I will make sure her aunt is there to pick her up,”

“Splendid! I’ll have her bring a few treats for you! I love having your daughter about! I’ve always wanted a little girl and she’s perfect!” Mom smile as the man left. Everyone knew Mr. Kirkland was an odd man, harmless but odd.

***
Artie whistled happily has he mixed two bowls of frosting, one was a black color and the other was red. It’s been awhile since he’s experimented on new things. He took out his recipe on flourless chocolate cupcakes. Poppet loved those and he was sure her classmates will too, especially with a cherry flavored heart.

“Now…where did I put that…oh here it is!” he takes out a bottle marked Polonium 201 and pours it into the black frosting and mixing, “Dear Miss Flippen, I really hope you’ve made peace with yourself. It’s not really fun picking on a harmless child, my little chum for that matter. Shame on you, shame, shame, shame, now let’s see…” he separates the batter into two separate bowls and took out two vials with AI and SI on them and pours them into the batter. He then mixed everything really good! He poured that batter into red cupcake paper and poured the regular batter into white paper. He smiles in satisfaction, He couldn’t wait for tomorrow. This will be an excellent treat for his little Poppet and her little friends.

***
______ wore the dress that Mr. Kirkland got for her a few days ago. Since it was Valentine’s Day, the school had free dress, as long as it was cheery, red, or heart themed. The Goths girl wore an anti-Valentine’s day top with the Kingdom Heart’s Heartless symbol on it. Miss Flippen gave them detention, even though Mary showed up with nothing fitting the category, the teacher did nothing. Miss Flippen looked at _____ when she entered the class.

“I have a question sweetheart, does your mommy still dress you?” the class laughed. She looked down as she walked towards her seat. Before she sat down, Mr. Kirkland appeared at the door.

“Hello dears!” he said brightly. The principal was behind him and took Miss Flippen aside to explain what was about to happen. In the meantime, Artie puts a mini cupcake hat on ________, “That’s better! You look darling!” he gave her the cupcakes with the red hearts, “Gives these to your friends, I’ll handle the rest,” he said smiling.

“Mr. Kirkland and ______ decided to give us all a little treat for Valentine’s Day!” said Miss Flippen with malicious sweetness, “Isn’t that nice? Everyone gets a complimentary cupcake today!” the class cheered. The pair split up. ________ passed out the ones with the red hearts and Mr. Kirkland passed out the ones with the black hearts. She passed them all out to all of the students who were nice to her and Artie passed them out to the rest. He grins and goes to Miss Flippen.

“And of course a super special one for the teacher!” he said passing a large one with a black large black heart on it. Everyone immediately torn into their cupcakes. ________ didn’t get one. No, she was going to her tea party and she wanted to eat as much as she wanted. After school, she literately ran to the bakery. Mr. Kirkland was wearing bright pink and blue suit with a large bowtie and a Mad Hatter’s top hat. He bows.

“Ready?”

“Ready!”

“Then my little queen, it’s time to have our royal tea party!”

***
“Hi Mr. Kirkland!”

“Hello Poppet! How are things?”

“Good and bad!”

“Oh? Why bad?”

“Half my class and Miss Flippen all got really sick!”

“Oh?”

“Yeah! They were fine until the weekend! The principal said that Miss Flippen contracted radiation poisoning and isn’t really expected to live. The substitute teacher is really nice! We used to have him whenever a teacher was sick. The kids who got sick all got something weird; it’s said to be a combination of the bird flu that used to be around and the swine flu. Doctors are baffled on how they all got it! They said it was probably something they ate. It couldn’t be your cupcakes because I eat them all the time and I’m never sick! Then again I do get tummy aches if I eat too many. Some of the kids have been hospitalized and some of them have been quarantined in their homes! It’s awful but the good news is that’s it all the mean kids so we can all relax for a change! The Goth kids and I had a book club sponsored by the new teacher! Miss Flippen never approved it and he did!”

“That’s good! It’s a shame about your classmates though,”

“And Miss Flippen is under review! Beatrix had a recorder in her backpack the day she was teasing me about the essay and took a video of the bathroom incident! She overheard her talking to Mary in the coatroom about it and decided to set up her camera in the bathroom and recorded the whole thing! So now when everyone gets better, disciplinary action will take place!”

“That’s terrific!”

“I know but at least I don’t have to worry about being bullied or teased anymore! I hope they’ll be okay though. I wish I could be as tough as you were when you were my age!”

“Oh love, you’re tougher than you look! You just show it in a different way! Now, let’s not talk about sick students and teachers! I just made a new batch of cupcakes and I need a taste tester! Are you in?”

“You bet!” he moves aside as she scattered in. The familiar pink swirls in his eyes reappeared. Looks like he has unfinished business but first he needed to get these cupcakes approved by his Little Helper.

***
Miss Flippen had no idea what was wrong with her. She’s been coughing, shivering, vomiting, and explosive diarrhea. She didn’t know what was going on with her. At first she thought it was the flu, until her teeth and hair started falling out. She was vomiting more and even now even particles of skin. She was in the hospital now; her organs were failing because of her radiation poisoning. She couldn’t keep anything down. Every single thing she ate was immediately expelled through her front or back. She knew she was on death’s door. She was losing a lot of weight, she was becoming more and more pale. But what added more insult to injury was one of those kids recorded her, probably those fucking Goth students and she was under review and inquiry and until her hearing, no pay. She growls thinking about those brats.

“Ah hello, Miss Flippen,” she looks up. Artie was smiling at her from her bedside. She glares at him.

“Decided to attack dear sick children now, pedophile?”

“Love, you really shouldn’t say mean things like that about people you don’t know and terrified of,”

“I’m not scared of a little child molester like you,”

“I know you shouldn’t be but you’ve make my little poppet terrified. I’m glad she stills have that childlike innocence and respect for adults, even though you’ve tried to crush it,”

“You fucking right I did!” the woman spats at him, “Walking about like she’s in a fairytale. She needs to grow up and be miserable like the rest of us!” Artie cocks his head.

“You weren’t loved as a child? Ah I see, she does have the charmed life, doesn’t she, two loving parents, the best education, a creative imagination, cupcakes every week, and the ability to laugh and be carefree. Anyone would be envious of that if they never had it. Then again her suffering didn’t last long, yours I’m sad to say is only beginning. You see, I don’t like when people mess with my little ones,” he takes out a syringe filled with strange liquid, “I see you haven’t learned your lesson, so I’m going to have to increase your suffering my dear. This is a very rare disease. I’ve been looking for the perfect guinea pig for and you’re the lucky sweetie who’s going to be my first victim,” he takes the syringe and releases the liquid into her IV, “All I know is that it attacks your throat and his nervous system and on top of that, you have radiation poisoning, such a pity, I hope you enjoy you last few years in life, they’re not going to be well. My little poppet may be forgiving but sadly, my school life turned me into a unremorseful little man. Toodles!”

Artie walks out of the hospital room whistling a jaunty tune as he went as some nurses ran into the woman’s room as she vomited blood and had a severe seizure. He passed by the video room and held out his hand. Ivan drops the video into his hands.

“Thank you,”

“Da,”