Hell

What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear the word: Hell? Many picture fire, brimstone, eternal torment, and every single way you can repent for your sins. However, I know what Hell is. Hell is something entirely different from what we have originally thought. I’ll admit, when I got here…I thought I was going to face it all. I thought I was going to have to live in this unholy place forever. But I was greeted to riches and treasures that I’ve only read and seen in movies, I was greeted to finery and all kind of good things. I had good food to eat, I had everything I’ve always wanted in life and more. Of course I knew better than to look a gift horse in the mouth and thoroughly enjoyed myself. This went on for a very long time. Anything I wanted was there. My mother? She was there. That bitch teacher I wanted to fuck the shit out of because I could. She was there. My sister that I hated and of course mom liked better? She was there. Every single person who wronged me? There were there and I could do whatever I wanted to them. I had everything, cold do anything, and the outcome was the way I wanted it to be…then I discovered that’s just what it was. I could have anything I wanted without effort. The people and world I created…was just an illusion. I couldn’t escape. I could confide in someone. And although I summoned these people, I knew what they were. They were demons in disguise, waiting to do my bidding. Anything bidding. I could hear them laughing at me. I could hear them speaking about how pathetic I was for thinking I was in control of all this. This prompted…something else. You see when you die, you still keep your human emotions. Depending on where you go I’m assuming you get some with intensity and the others not so much. I remember…hitting the bottle. I drank everything I could get my hands on in my new world, vodka, whiskey, sake, tequila, sangria, anything that would have normally numbed the pain. Nothing. I tried drugs. You can materialize anything illegal you want down there. Once again. Nothing. No escape no feelings of euphoria there was nothing. I resigned myself to my room, under a blanket, with no warmth, just coldness, just emptiness, just despair. I knew the last result to help me relieve this feeling. I materialized a gun. I went to the mirror. I wanted to see myself when I finally ended it. I placed the gun to my temple and pulled. I SAW my brains painting the walls, I saw my skull exploding, I SAW my head materialize back. It as then I knew….there was no escape. I swallowed pills. Nothing. I hung myself and felt my neck collapse but there was no pain. My last attempt was trying to jump off a bridge several miles. I jumped, wanting to feel the sweet release of this…overwhelming feeling of despair and sadness. I hit the water. I felt myself sinking, my body didn’t even feel the icy cold water. As I sank, I felt the despair growing. Tears formed in my eyes as I saw the demon rescuers pull me up into a boat, heading back to shore. The coastal guard gave me a mocking smirk.

“Hey pal, don’t worry! You have the rest of eternity to try again!”